There were happy people in the hallway
And a few that were sad
Most were tired, it was Friday,
And they had weekends planned
Just then a scratchy voice was heard
Loud on the intercom
And though its tone was quite absurd
The students remained calm
"Good morning students, nay, my pawns. I have one things to say. If you would listen, darling brats, and then be on your way. The game will start at six o'clock, the party is at nine. If you do come, please leave your thoughts, I'm sure they will be fine. The ho's are at the front door and the weed is at the back, and if you've paid your monthly dues then we can get you crack."
The service was quite beautiful,
The crowd was quite well dressed
Perhaps a tad pontifical,
But all said they were blessed
And as the sermon ended
A man stepped to the front
His attire was quite splendid,
Though his tone was rather blunt
"Before you leave, my bretheren, I have one thing to say. We provide some comfort here, and I think it's time you pay. The standard charge for habit and for egos is the same. Pleasing mother is half off, if that's why you came. The music was quite beautiful, but it all comes at a price, so if you think you're dutiful a fifty would be nice. If you came to get your share of looking down on sinners, please remember tax is doubled, and that's just for beginners."